Hmm My Lord Hari, won’t you come out of your intricate maze and reveal yourself to me?
You are the one who stole this heart and now how could you be so detached from me?
You are one who came chasing me but the moment I looked around to find you, YOU have GONE to the invisible city to which no one knows the route!!!(atleast I do not know the route)…
The more I try to find you, the more you hide behind the screens…
The more I try to understand you, you try to make it more complex for me by hiding in puzzles..
The more I want to be with you, looks like you make me chase you more vigorously…..I do get breathless Hari….!
The less or more I talk to you….your ONLY response is SILENCE!!! Am I talking to my bedroom walls Hari? Hmm…even in that case, the walls would have given me some response to my tears?
Is this fair on your part dear lord??
I have told my friends that you are easily approachable with a lot of confidence in you…now you are contradicting my understanding is it dear lord?
Is it a new test? Or a new game of love?
Whatever be it…..am yours! You have full authority on me. Am ALL yours for ever & ever! You may play any sort of game whether it brings smile on my face or tears on my eyes…both are same to me as long as this heart is glued to your enchanting form….
Dear Narayana.., If you are going to complain about my inadequate devotion to you & if you are going to establish that as a reason for not coming in front of me , dear Lord, here …I have only one response to all your complains……**am Surrender unto you totally**...Nothing belongs to me except YOU Hari! Am like a clay in your beautiful hands. You have to give your desired shape, color, size and make it your favorite pot! What control does the clay have Hari????? Can the poor clay turn into a beautiful huge colorful pot on its own? I can’t even untangle myself from materialistic complex knots all by myself without YOU then how do you expect me to please you Hari……?
You should only bless me to please you Hari……forever!
You should bless me to make you HAPPY…forever!
You should make me a worthy instrument in your hand….forever!
You should ALWAYS keep me attracted to you alone…..
The moment I place a cup of milk in a vessel and say, “krishnarpanam!” thinking about you, it becomes yours, isn’t it? I place myself on a bed of roses and say.., “Krishnarpanam!”……..only the roses reach you is it sweet Hari? I don’t think so my pillows get drenched in tears of those lucky roses Hari? ……oh if you have misunderstood……please watch me closely Hari…….my pillows get drenched out of my unstoppable tears………my bed sheets get drenched out of passion for YOU alone Hari…..
Nothing more can this shameless creature say Hari……
I Love you my dear lord…..perhaps it is nothing in front of your eyes after having immersed in the immense love of your other dear girlfriends and consorts BUT please remember dear Narayana this heart doesn’t crave for anyone or anything else as it craves for you! You have swallowed my entire heart and forgotten all about it totally L
Oh LUEN I know...It is one of those days when things don't seem to work right, and when you go in His sharanagati, you expect him to sympathize and speak with you, wipe your tears and console you..BUT, at times it fails to happen...
ReplyDeleteBut Don't take that to anyway mean that He doesn't love you. He does everything for a reason,and so perhaps, He was being so cold for some very crucial cause...who knows, it might be annoying to you right now but probably later you will understand that "all happens for good."
All that said, I know how easy it is to offer condolences and speak all so wisely, but difficult in action. I remember when I was down, you made me cheerful. Well, this is not like a pay-back, but I really feel, I really do, what you must be experiencing and I just want to relieve you by saying that He has a lovely plan for you...And whatever that is troubling you presently will vanish in the glory of His love and compassion- and you will understand how all the more loving He is...
wow...thanks for your wonderful words Tanvee:-))
Delete"I just want to relieve you by saying that He has a
lovely plan for you"---thanks specially for reminding
me about it...u know thats what I tell myself sometimes..
You've exactly said the same:-)) MANY many thanks to u!!
He Loves me...he makes me understand that severel times
In several diff ways...just that sometimes Miss him way too much...and things change all of a sudden!
Nevertheless, I have friends who wud put me back to that
lovely state of mind wherein I think, "Yes he does love me"
Thanks!
Let me share something. When u cry for His love, for His compassion etc, pause for a sec; wipe your tears and watch His face. Look at His eyes. Don't they feel your pain? Don't they look like they tell you to stop crying needlessly?
ReplyDeleteWell, This has happened with me...and the thought of making Krishna sad/ cry is like very unforgiving. So I usually stop, and then, very immediately my form fills up with so much confidence and happiness.
I tell myself, " Yes, He loves me. " :D
Yes Tanvee..,
DeleteActually...I have noticed that several times..u know when I really cry in pain..his looks v.moved..
One morning, I was so locked inside the room & did no work at home...was just sitting & talking to him...my MIL had done all the work at home that day....I felt v guilty already but u wont believe...He totally frowned at me that morning...then these days, I make sure I do my responsibilities well to my best capability with his grace....same way, he smiles also so much when he is happy...its like HE is LIVING with us totally:-)) Krishna Krishna......dont worry Tanve..am all happy again! Thanks re!
Even a thousand eyes are not sufficient to relish the beauty of the Lord. Such a wonderful picture.
ReplyDeleteAbout your letter to Him, I must not say anything. It's between you and Him. :)
Hello Ramesh Ji,
DeleteThanks a lot! I know..isn't he amazing??? when our eyes gets to feast on him, everything else becomes
insignifcnt:-)) What do I say about our Lord!!
aka, what do i say?
ReplyDeleteYou have filled my poor mobile phone with His presence.
i wish i could say something which would please your ears.
But, instead, all i can offer is that the post induced tears in me. :(
i find myself incapable of words that can convince you. And, yet, if we really are experiencing "SILENCE", let us understand that it is relative, He seems "silent" only because there are those wonderful times when He has been otherwise.
There are those beautiful times when He has responded so amazingly, and filled our hearts with overflowing love.
It is only because we can remind ourselves of those times that we find Him "silent".
Let us hope, beg, pray and beseech that He bestows that pleasure and ecstacy on us again. And this time, do so in a more intense manner.
i understand that only He can wipe your tears, so i am going to finish by telling Him that He better do so fast! :p
HI ILWK,
ReplyDeleteTrue!!
I have never thought about it in this particuliar dimension...yes IF at all, we feel his silence, it is only bcas it has been otherwise N no of times:-))...thanks:-)
Jai shree Krishna all of you..!!!
ReplyDeleteI was so overwhelmed to see this blog!!! I have same feelings for our Mystic Lord. My friends and people around me make fun of mine, on havin such feelings towards Neel Megha, i never understood what makes them to do so??? It's wonderful here, i can read and talk freely about Him !!! Plz accept me as ur friend...i have no one to share my pain in His longing... only except Him
Dear Vandana,
DeleteWho r we to accept anyone? As already mentioned, this blog is one run by mad people ranting about Krishna!! Feel free to join us! We will be blessed if this blog is enriched with the love of another devotee, and hopefully our minds too! :)
@Vandana: welcome to the blog of Krishna lovers! I (we) happily welcome you! So glad that there are many more crazy lovers like me, ILWK ,LUEN, and nw you in this world to sweetly trouble that Dark One! :)
ReplyDeleteI never thought I would com across something like this.. this is amazing!! I have searched for a meaning to my own emotions towards the Lord but it just intensifies and gives no answer.. I know what you mean...
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteIt has been so long since you have posted on here. This blog is amazing. I wish the posts would continue.
ReplyDelete