Lord Hari-please attract me more!

As without the sunlight, the lotuses can’t blossom, without Hari’s sweet & kind intention to attract me, I can’t think of him….

Kodhai(Andal) lived for 15 years absolutely immersed in Hari bakthi…If only I could get just 5 mins from her 15 years, I’ll consider myself lucky! And during those precious 5 mins(generously shared by my elder sister Kodhai), I shall grab his beautiful lotus feet and ask him, “Hari, let me constantly have this love for you ever & ever…no matter how many births this soul awaits to take, let me always be bound by your love….let this heart be filled with over-flowing passion for you! Let this mind & intelligence be fixed on you! Let me please you with my thoughts & deeds! Let this mouth always sing your names and your glories, let this ears always hear about you! Let me forget myself in thoughts of you…….let me unite with you!”


For what better purpose this birth was blessed on me?
Only to please Hari, serve Hari, Talk about Hari, Write about Hari…..above all, Love Hari whole-heartedly!! What else can give this happiness? What else can give this pain? Who else other than Hari can make me so crazy? Who else can this heart hold when there is no space literally as Hari has occupied all the space!


I have never loved anyone so much, have never been angry with anyone so much, have never craved for anyone so much, have never talked about anyone so much, have never cried for anyone so much, have never laughed so much, have never been aroused so much, …..all the emotions are directed to him. Like how the waves belong to the sea alone, all my emotions are greedily taken by that Hari……yet everything feels so little…not even close to the size of a drop of water in the ocean…..why do I want Vaikuntam? Why Do I want heavenly planets? All that this heart yearns is to love him more, experience this love for him again & again & again…..


Oh!! Mother Earth is my home----will return here as much as possible to think of him, wander hither & thither singing about him, Shall be housed in a place encircled with sweet & colorful flowers which I shall pluck singing about him, deeply immersed in love, make beautiful garlands and decorate him, Shall decorate myself with sweet smelling flowers and beautiful attire for him to gaze at me & embrace me, shall rag him, chide him, play with him, be mad at him until he consoles me, shall grab him and celebrate love with him……shall make him happy, so happy that he sheds tears of joy! Shall give him immense pleasure to the extent that he starts to sweat and pant! Oh! What will I do to ease the situation for him other than stroke his beautiful hair with my delicate fingers!!! Shall cook for him, serve him & fan him while he eats.., as a gift for the delicious food I shall partake some food along with him…..shall massage him with oil and bathe him……though his wife I shall take care of him like a child!!! Vaikuntam cannot facilitate as much as my mother Earth facilitates me----!!!! I keep asking myself then…..”Ok what is the end then? When only will this soul reach Vaikuntam-his abode and unite with him eternally?” My only answer is…”Hari only cares!!!! Who am I to care? Only He belongs to me……He decides every step for me….When He is there why should I keep wondering about other things?” All that I want is “BIRTH” to love HIM and unite with himJ- He only gives desires….He is the DOER! Who am I but a puppet in his hands!!


I beg him to attract me more to him!

Message to Lord Hari..

Hmm My Lord Hari, won’t you come out of your intricate maze and reveal yourself to me?

You are the one who stole this heart and now how could you be so detached from me?

You are one who came chasing me but the moment I looked around to find you, YOU have GONE to the invisible city to which no one knows the route!!!(atleast I do not know the route)…

The more I try to find you, the more you hide behind the screens…

The more I try to understand you, you try to make it more complex for me by hiding in puzzles..

The more I want to be with you, looks like you make me chase you more vigorously…..I do get breathless Hari….!

The less or more I talk to you….your ONLY response is SILENCE!!! Am I talking to my bedroom walls Hari? Hmm…even in that case, the walls would have given me some response to my tears?

Is this fair on your part dear lord??

I have told my friends that you are easily approachable with a lot of confidence in you…now you are contradicting my understanding is it dear lord?

Is it a new test? Or a new game of love?

Whatever be it…..am yours! You have full authority on me. Am ALL yours for ever & ever! You may play any sort of game whether it brings smile on my face or tears on my eyes…both are same to me as long as this heart is glued to your enchanting form….

Dear Narayana.., If you are going to complain about my inadequate devotion to you & if you are going to establish that as a reason for not coming in front of me , dear Lord, here …I have only one response to all your complains……**am Surrender unto you totally**...Nothing belongs to me except YOU Hari! Am like a clay in your beautiful hands. You have to give your desired shape, color, size and make it your favorite pot! What control does the clay have Hari????? Can the poor clay turn into a beautiful huge colorful pot on its own? I can’t even untangle myself from materialistic complex knots all by myself without YOU then how do you expect me to please you Hari……?

You should only bless me to please you Hari……forever!

You should bless me to make you HAPPY…forever!

You should make me a worthy instrument in your hand….forever!

You should ALWAYS keep me attracted to you alone…..

The moment I place a cup of milk in a vessel and say, “krishnarpanam!” thinking about you, it becomes yours, isn’t it? I place myself on a bed of roses and say.., “Krishnarpanam!”……..only the roses reach you is it sweet Hari? I don’t think so my pillows get drenched in tears of those lucky roses Hari? ……oh if you have misunderstood……please watch me closely Hari…….my pillows get drenched out of my unstoppable tears………my bed sheets get drenched out of passion for YOU alone Hari…..

Nothing more can this shameless creature say Hari……

I Love you my dear lord…..perhaps it is nothing in front of your eyes after having immersed in the immense love of your other dear girlfriends and consorts BUT please remember dear Narayana this heart doesn’t crave for anyone or anything else as it craves for you! You have swallowed my entire heart and forgotten all about it totally L